What Christmas Is All About - from the Battle Pope Christmas Pope-tacular Issue

Before Robert Kirkman's smash hit The Walking Dead, there was Battle Pope - a story about a violent and womanizing Pope [Leopold Oswald II] who was selected by God to save humanity from demons with Jesus Christ as his sidekick. And I'm not joking.

Anyway, they had a special Christmas comic which showed Jesus Christ lamenting about people forgetting him during his birthday and blames Santa Claus because of overshadowing his birthday with toys and candy bars. Let's get on to the scenes shall we?

Then he gets angry at a kid staring at a bunch of toys in a toy shop:

The guy does have a point, doesn't he? And who says you won't get a good thing or two out of comic books? Moving on...

After that, an angry Jesus decides get some retribution by engaging with Santa in a live MMA fight:

Jesus vs Santa - I thought I would ever ever see this.

So who wins? Nobody. Fortunately, Santa apologizes and Jesus forgives him. Then in another insane surprise, Mary comes down from the heavens to visit and celebrate with her son on this very special day:

I did not expect her to make an appearance. Seriously.

And it didn't end there. A lot of things happened after that. uhm, like... Pope and Mary screwin'? you know, I'm kind of afraid that a bolt of lightning would strike me and send my brains flying while I'm writing this, so I'm gonna shut up.

By the way, Robert Kirkman and Tony Moore are still alive today, got away from God's wrath with this insane of a comic book and were able to make it big time with their one of a kind zombie apocalypse tale. Now tell me that's not what every comic book writer/artist is dreaming of.

So there goes my special Christmas feature where we learn about the true meaning of Christmas via a hilariously blasphemous comic book that sure offended a couple of religious peeps - except me. maybe.



P.S. I'm not going to write anything like this again. King Leonidas might kick me down to that ginormous Spartan pit they got next time. 

MERRY CHRISTMAS EVERYONE!!!

Does Batman Even Celebrate Christmas?

Since the yuletide season has arrived and Christmas is around the corner, let us see how our superhero friends, especially the Dark Knight are spending their time during Christmas. We all know that Batman doesn't smile a lot, loves shadows and the night, so it would be interesting to see him celebrate one of the most bright and lively days of the year.

We got some visual aids for you so you can see how The Bat celebrates Christmas through the years.

So he does celebrate Christmas based from this cover from Batman #45. He's got gifts, acts like Santa Claus with Robin and jumping out from that box for dramatic effect. Bat-and-pixie-in-a-box.

From Batman # 15. Way way back his early days.

This one is the cover of Batman 27. Batman and Robin helping good 'ol Santa with his gifts. He's all smiles you see? Never thought he could do that before.

Just found this on Google images so i don't know if this is from a comic book, but I think not. Anyway, Bats is not to happy to see Santa join the JLA. Don't you think he's a big kill-joy?

 

Another pic from Google Images.And guess who's not smiling. Right.

I love this portrait from Alex Ross. He perfectly illlustrates the JLA furnishing that big christmas tree and everybody is happy doing it. But what strikes me most is that Superman notices the lonely Batman looking from outside and calls him out to join them. I felt sorry for Batman when I first saw this, but overall a great portrait showing the real Spirit of Christmas.

The Batman himself getting "The Tumbler" as his christmas gift? You gotta be kidding me. They should've included this in Christopher Nolan's "The Dark Knight".

If you thought that the previous image was sweet, check this one where Batman gives a gift to Jim Gordon. Thoughtful isn't it?

But I guess after all the cheesyness of Batman giving gifts, smiling, hitting on Grandpa Jim and all that, everything would be ruined if you mention the words "parents" and "Christmas" in a single sentence: